Tuesday, 26 June 2007

Chapter 9 - Waking Up from a Bad sleep

“The Talmud teaches:

Just before a baby is born,

an angel shows it everything there is to know

and learn

on Earth.

Then at the moment of birth,

the angel touches the infant’s upper lip,

and the child forgets everything.

We spend the rest of our lives


what the angel showed us.

This is a generic guide

to the meaning of life.

It does not describe one view

of the meaning of life

and recommend you adopt it.

It helps you remember

what the angel showed you.

The angel showed you

the meaning of life.

In case you have not remembered yet,

here is what the angel showed you.”

William Blank

April 20 2000

They say before you die your life flashes before your eyes, well it seemed as though I had just had a brief recap of my life, again.

When I woke up I was in a hospital ward. The last thing I remembered was getting the smack filled red balloon from Lee and shooting up in the toilets. I wondered if like Neo, I had made the right choice.

I could hear the chorus to Jethro Tull’s “Skating away on the thin ice of a new day”.

Bright fluorescent lights greeted me. I felt groggy there was a drip in my arm and they had taken my shirt off. Sitting up I felt disorientated but hungry. A nurse was serving lunch and so I requested a vegetarian meal. The nurse smiled and brought me a salad sandwich, which I quickly gobbled up.

I wondered how I had got there, I could see that I was in a hospital but had no recollection of travelling there, more lost time. Maybe I had been abducted again, or was it just another OD.

People often asked me why I was a vegetarian. I wasn’t raised that way, I had enjoyed my meat. In the years leading up to my conversion I had a few different experiences. I had eaten meat for 24 years, I have never liked eating meat that was grissly or tough, or had blood or other signs of life. When eating my mince I would often think about where it came from.

Aside from the philosophical, environmental and spiritual reasons for being vegetarian I was having major problems with stomach ulcers and constipation. As soon as I stopped eating meat these problems disappeared. This makes sense because meat requires a very high level of acidity to digest and meat has no fibre and can therefore exacerbate constipation. Furthermore, you can get all the nutrients you need from a vegetarian diet.

So I believed that eating meat was unnecessary for humans. The nurse who brought my lunch came back and said, “So why are you a vegetarian Dave?”

“Well there is no need to eat meat, we can get all the things we need from a vego diet………. People have the long intestines and teeth of herbivores, while carnivores have short intestines to expel the flesh that quickly begins to putrefy once consumed. When meat is eaten by humans it stays caught in the folds of the intestine to rot and putrefy, and this is major factor in conditions like bowel cancer“

“You sure about that man?”, the nurse looked doubtful.

“Not only is it unhealthy to consume flesh but its brutal to raise mammals that are sentient beings to be callously slaughtered. Furthermore eating meat is environmentally damaging, in order to breed more cows countless millions of hectares of rainforest, the lungs of the earth are cleared, to make way for cows who produce methane one of the major greenhouse gasses. Depending on the type of animal it takes between 10kg and 20kg of feed to produce 1kg of meat, therefore reducing the amount of grain available for human consumption and exacerbating malnutrition in third world countries. Furthermore, producing meat consumes massive amounts of water when compared to the amount of water required to produce a vegetarian diet. For example 50% of U.S. water consumption goes to livestock production, and check these quotes out......"

Cow farms, for example, produce millions of tons of carbon dioxide and methane per year, two major greenhouse gases which together account for over 90% of US greenhouse emissions, significantly contributing to global scorching (what is euphemistically called global warming). Global warming is already having grave effects on our planet.”

“Every year, about 125,000 square miles (325,000 sq. km) of rain forest (along with the more than 1,000 plant and animal species that live there) are lost (or become extinct). More than half of that land is now used for grazing cattle. An estimated 80% of annual world deforestation is related to animal agriculture.”


"Sounds pretty convincing but I dont know, I really like my burgers...", the nurse shifted his weight onto his left leg and put his hand on his hip.

“I mean, don’t get me wrong I’m not a preacher, though I might sound like one, I mean I used to eat heaps of meat all the time, but I had some bowel and stomach problems, combined with my exposure to Greenpeace, meditation and travelling through India lead me to change my mind. Never looked back since. “

“I believe that people will look back on this time and see the meat industry for what it is an animal holocaust, but on a much grander scale than that perpetrated against the jews.”

“There have been some great vegetarians in history Leonardo da Vinci, Albert Einstein, Leo Tolstoy, Paul McCartney, Pythagoras, Sir Isaac Newton, and lets not forget Weird Al Yakovic, and oh yeah Rastafarians are vego too.”

“Truly man is the king of beasts, for his brutality exceeds theirs. We live by the death of others: We are burial places! “

Leonardo da Vinci's '

“Wasn’t Adolf Hitler a vegetarian?”, the nurse had this got you now look on his face.

“Yes he was, but you know there are always exceptions to the rule.”

“As long as Man continues to be the ruthless destroyer of lower living beings he will never know health or peace. For as long as men massacre animals, they will kill each other. Indeed, he who sows the seed of murder and pain cannot reap joy and love." [4]


“I had a copy of Mein Kampf was on my bookshelf. I had tried to read the whole thing a few times but the his writing style made it tough going. I would occasionally pick it up and read a few paragraphs, but there is no doubt he was a crazy mother fucker “, the nurse confessed.

“I was fascinated by the enigma of Hitler and felt that some of his ideas were spot on. Vegetarianism, art appreciation, environmentalism and to me he was also a powerful father figure, a role that was conspicuously absent from my life. Although he was a rather strict and somewhat unforgiving dad………… “, as he spoke his eyes shifted up and to the right as he recalled the many films and books he had read on the subject while working night shift in the morgue.

“I often thought how so many people had misunderstood Hitler. “

“What the fuck are you talking about?”, I said.

“Hey they say that Hitler was a frustrated artist but he wasn’t frustrated at all, man. He was expressing the full glory of his artistic passion through ‘Blitz Krieg’! He was the greatest performance artist ever! I mean he had his shortcomings there is no doubt about that he killed lots of people which was obviously fucked up, but you know nothing is totally good, and nothing is totally bad, we need to be aware of this, The man was a fuckin genius, albeit a severely disturbed one.”

"But if we just suspend our moral judgements for a moment and think about it World War II was performance art on a grand scale. The Germans did it in style; great uniforms (designed by Hugo Boss), slogans, flags, speeches, stylish cars (BMW, Mercedes). The awesome weapons and technology, all driven by the rabid fanaticism of the population, stirred up by the master agitator Hitler, " he moved his arms to simulate marching in a goose step as he reveled in his favourite topic.

“ National Socialism wasn’t a political movement it was an artistic one, its just that they were very organized and aggressive in pursuit of their artistic ideal. The whole thing with the final solution was about removing undesirable elements from the canvas that was Germany

“Nazi theory indeed specifically denies that such a thing as "the truth" exists. […] The implied objective of this line of thought is a nightmare world in which the Leader, or some ruling clique, controls not only the future but THE PAST. If the Leader says of such and such an event, "It never happened"—well, it never happened. If he says that two and two are five—well, two and two are five. This prospect frightens me much more than bombs […] “

George Orwell

Nazi’s and the postmodernists in a pact to take over the world.

“Man you are so full of fuckin shit, the guy was a fuckin psycho who caused the deaths of millions of people, jeezus Christ dude cant you fuckin see that?”

“How the fuck do we really know what he did. I mean history is always written by the victor and of course they always distort it.”

“Oh great, now we’re onto your conspiracy theory bullshit hey!”

“No not so quickly my friend, you cant just write it off as a conspiracy theory, I mean what the fuck does that mean anyway, I mean anytime two people get together to plan some thing they are conspiring, right I mean that’s what the fuckin stupid word means aint it? But just as an example, Hitler Time man of the year 1938, the British Friekorps, and the traditional salute of the American people”

“Got mit uns” or “In god we trust”

“The whole spectacle of combat, the surreal beauty of the destruction set to symphonies of screaming Stukas and roaring Panzers.” I was bemused. “How could anyone not see that it was a master at work, the greatest art installation ever?”

“But was the Reich destroyed or had it simply morphed into the new world order. The Americans had claimed the spear of destiny and with it they unleashed a power never before seen on earth. “

“There was this Taiwanese advertising agency that created a campaign using the slogan, “Declare war on the cold front” alongside a picture of a smiling Adolph Hitler arm raised in a Nazi salute to advertise a German made heater.

“He was the Time magazine man of the year in 1938”


“No man, its fuckin true, just look it up mate.”

“The Roman salute with a closed finger, flat palm down hand raised 45 degree angle was the civilian salute of the USA from 1787 – 1934 or there abouts and they changed to the hand over heart with rise of Nazis.”

“Its like using Pol Pot to promote Cambodia. But its interesting how other cultures view things. “

”Hitler viewed himself first and foremost as an artist, his activities were largely directed to the promotion of the arts”
Frederic Spotts

Albert Speer also made the observation that Hitler always thought of himself as an artist first. Hitler created his own Virtual Reality called National Socialism. such as the His vision of the Aryan super-state was expressed both in art and politics. Utilizing superior marketing and the power of iconographyswastika, the Nuremburg rallies and SS uniforms designed by Hugo Boss. “

“What the fuck you talking bout, Willis, Hugo fuckin Boss, whats he got to do with it?”

“Boss founded his family-owned garment business in 1923. The company struggled for a time, fell into bankruptcy, and then, during the war, made the uniforms worn by the German SS, storm troopers, Wehrmacht and Hitler Youth. It's likely that the factory was manned by forced labor including concentration camp prisoners and prisoners of war.”

Nazism was the modern equivalent of ‘Back Yard Blitzkreig’. Funny that the creators of this gardening show chose the word blitz, you see they knew that Hitler was really an artist. They aimed to remodel the world according to their own specific aesthetics and Blitzkrieg, from the (A person of German nationality) German for "lightning war", was a tool to achieve this ends.

“Hitler was a performance artist. His artistic tools were hypnotic oratory, moving spectacle, elegant design and the fine art of genocide”

"I think [Hitler] saw the Nazi movement as an art movement, and I'm not the first or only person to say this, can you imagine Tony Blair redesigning the political theatre of England? Only an artist would do that."


“All racism, on some level, is aesthetic, as a projection of "the ugly." Hitler's "taste," according to Ms. Rothschild, was a key factor that motivated his actions to eliminate the Jews, whose physical appearance offended his aesthetic preferences.

“Many people seem to suggest that Hitler was a "failed artist." He was masterly, first as an orator and then as an all-around impresario of political theatre.Hitler redefined the political speaker, helped create the science of propaganda and showed the unparalleled might of public spectacle in swaying the minds and heart of the populace.He should be on the the list of the 20th century's great artists his choreography, casting, set design and screenplay for World War II and the Holocaust were very original.................Hitler was a master at staging a really big show--the kind that millionaire rock stars now routinely offer their fans."
Martin Knelman Reporter the Toronto Star

“The highest art will be that which has been visibly shattered by the explosions of last week, which is forever trying to collect its limbs after yesterday's crash”.
German Dada manifesto

"It had been the great ambition of his [Hitler's] life to become an artist - an ambition which he sternly sacrificed to his conviction that he had a mission and that his political plans... would be the salvation of his country." Heinrich Hoffman, Hitler's photographer wrote in his memoir Hitler Was My Friend

“PK Dick believed that all political tyrannies were aspects of one cosmic oppressor: the Black Iron Prison a timeless archetype that he associated with the Roman Empire. Dick sometimes thought that history was an illusion and that the Nixon administration's dirty tricks only proved that ‘The Empire’ never ended. “

All the wars in history are created by the Black Iron Prison to further its power and control.”

After eating my fill I pulled out the drip, put my shirt on, and while still a bit dazed, made my way to the exit. No one said anything to me. It was as though I was a ghost, unseen by all. For a moment I imagined that I was a ghost and this was all just some cruel game. But my knees hurt, must have been where I fell over when I overdosed.

As I walked out the main entrance to the hospital, I saw a familiar face. It was someone that I had known quite well, but I couldn’t place him.

Later I would recall that it was a friend from school; I hadn’t seen him in years and barely recognised him. We had been close then, with similar goals, university a profession and adventure. Yet as we passed by it was clear to see the contrast in the two different paths we had travelled.

I had gone to university, but I never really adjusted. I started 5 degrees but only completed one. Feeling lost and uncertain I carried on developing the heroin habit I had acquired while still a naïve student, keen to experiment.

While Dorian Grey had studied law and was now a partner in a large law firm. I lived on the streets, and couched surfed (stayed with different friends), boarding houses, assorted hostels, and my parents homes. Meanwhile, Dorian studied hard, completed a dual degree in Arts/Law and all the while no-one knew about his secret, his passion.

Dorian was handsome of average height, with a slim physique, and impeccably dressed in the finest Italian suit, glistening shoes and clear lightly tanned complexion. While I was clad in a black stained t- shirt and cargo pants with thongs, my matted hair, obscuring my dark eyes and pallid complexion.

And now as we passed each other at the hospital it happened. I remembered why I was here. Was it a chink in the matrix,…………………ah mushrooms what intense experiences one can have. Dorian was a friend from my real life, and I recalled THE GAME and the challenge. I knew what I must do psilocybin……

“In the Amazon and other places where visionary plants are understood and used, you are conveyed into worlds that are appallingly different from ordinary reality. Their vividness cannot be stressed enough. They are more real than real, and that's something that you sense intuitively. They establish an ontological priority. They are more real than real, and once you get that under your belt and let it rattle around in your mind, then the compass of your life begins to spin and you realize that you are not looking in on the Other; the Other is looking in on you.”

Terence McKenna

I was the messiah sent to save and so I would. Or so I told myself.

The question was would I do it. I mean we all know what we should be doing right? But how many of us do it?

The earth that breaths, I recalled a trip driving through the country side picking gold tops in the fields and eating them whole. The trip came on quickly and powerfully and in no time I found myself seeing things very differently.

It was as if I had been transported into the future and everyone I knew was gone and past away and I was observing it. I felt terrified in a detached way, what had happened where were they, oh the despair. Then the landscape morphed into a technicolour cartoon like world.

"Because modern institutions depend on the transmission of a certain world view and then willing acquiescense in the truth of that world view by the populations into which it is being exported. In other words a kind of cultural brainwashing is necessary for modern cultures to work at all. The consequences of the acceptance of this situation of brainwashing is further acceleration toward catastrophe."

Terrence McKenna

I realised that everyone was just sexual, that this absurd dichotomy of hetero – homo sexual was such a joke. I could see through the bullshit but I could not tell anyone it was my secret knowledge.

You see I was Dorian and it was that simple, and what I was seeing was an aspect of myself. That self that had chosen a different path.

Physicists talk of the multiple worlds phenomena that every time we make a choice we create a new reality and a new stream of consciousness. Small changes can create vastly different outcomes. A butterfly flapping its wings on one side of the world can create a tidal wave on the other side.

Wandering out into the morning air I felt strangely euphoric I had survived again. I had wasted my money though, and I was pretty straight now. As I walked out into the street the sounds of life enveloped me, and I thought about my next hit.

The last words I heard were “Allah Akabar”, and they came from my own lips.

A burst of flame and a tremendous force knocked everyone in front of the hospital to the ground. Glass and debris were scattered as the force of the explosion devastated the front entrance to the hospital.

My ears were ringing and I could see people mouthing words but no sounds came out.

The carnage was horrendous. Pieces of flesh scattered across the ground, mutilated limbs and agonised screams echoed through the area as my hearing slowly returned. People moaned in pain as confusion and panic set in.

Off to my left I could see Dorian, it looked as though he was unconscious, the explosion had not caused any obvious damage to him, but he was still, lying face down legs akimbo.

I clutched at my abdomen I had caught some flying debris in the stomach and spurts of blood were shooting forth, I was bleeding profusely. The pain was excruciating I felt as though I was going to black out, and then I did.

All around us was chaos

All those years before in Saudi, the airport in Riyadh Osama, that missing time those lost moments and terrorist attacks, a mole waiting to strike.

John Howard was visiting the hospital that day he was killed instantly in the explosion that ripped through the outpatients/emergency area.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Yeah, you should get some rohypnol to stop all this toxic crap destroying your brain - Peace

Who links to me?